If you've read any of my previous posts then you know that
November 6th is my birthday. It is a little ironic that I write this on my
birthday. The reason I'm writing this is because as an adult with Asperger's,
birthdays used to be very special to me, not just the fact it reminded me how
old I was, but I guess I liked it because it was all about me. In some small
way, I saw my birthday as a more special time than Christmas when I was young.
For some crazy reason, I can still remember a moment when I had turned 7, I was
climbing a tree in the front yard and just thinking that it was my birthday and
I knew what was going to happen. I do remember a few times when I was little
older, getting to go to Showbiz Pizza Place (it's now known as Chuck E. Cheese)
and boy did I have a blast! Lots of arcade games, games that you could win
tickets to get free stuff and they had an animatronic show with all the
mechanical animals singing like the ones you see at theme parks. As for the
pizza, I guess it was okay, it really didn't matter to me. I can't remember
which birthday it was, but probably my most favorite cake when I was younger
was a Batman cake with plastic bats surrounding the cake and on top was a
Batman figure who was ready to leap over a fence I believe. I just thought that
was the coldest cake I had ever seen.
It's kind of funny that I really can't
remember a lot of the gifts I had received over the years because I tend to get
them confused with Christmas and Easter presents. I was always excited about
the gifts because that was the biggest reward about having a birthday. Don't
get me wrong, I did like having grandparents there or best friends to celebrate
with, but hands down the presents were what I would tend to fixate on. (Love
that OCD!) Of course, as I have gotten older, a lot of that has changed.
I know that most people still tend to
really whoop it up when it's their birthday, but those are the kind of people
who are big partiers. There is nothing wrong with older people like myself to
go celebrate, but that's just not me because I just feel uncomfortable in those
situations. There is a little part of me that is happy that it's my birthday,
but it is nowhere near like it used to be. In a tiny way, I actually miss those
times, not the fact that I was a lot younger, but the great times I had as a
kid. I am a little disappointed that I can't remember all of my birthdays
having autism, but I do remember some of them and pictures help with my bad
memory. I know my wife would always like to do something special, but generally
we would do too much...maybe dinner and/or a movie. Jaimee really does want to
really celebrate, but when it comes to her birthday...not so much. I will say
that one of my proudest times with Jaimee's birthday was that I actually
through her a surprise party with all of our friends when we still lived in
southern Missouri. Jaimee had turned 30 that year and I wanted to make it
really special. I learned a valuable lesson from that experience...surprise
parties are very hard to arrange!!!
In my perspective about birthdays is that
you only get to be that age one time, for a year and then it's over. I really
try to make each year mean something positive and reflect on what I might have
done right and what I might have screwed up on. It is a passage of time that we
never get back and do want to make the most of it. I would try to see the
positive, but there have been too many times when I look back in frustration
because something may not have turned out like I had hoped it would or I really
missed an opportunity that I will never get again. I can truly say that my
birthday has changed a great deal to me, but I still try to have a little fun.
{Election Day will fall on my birthday and
we've elected several presidents on that day like Lincoln, Eisenhower and
Obama. Daylight Savings Time has ended on my birthday. If today is your birthday too then we share it with Sally Fields, Rebecca Romijn, Emma Stone, Maria Shriver, Ethan Hawke, etc.}
Song of Inspiration (Check it out on
iTunes or Android!):
Song: "Heart Attack"
Artist: Manafest
Album: Fighter
I simply picked this song because I love
it and it is my birthday!!! It is an awesome song and here's the video...or a least a few pics with the song...sorry.
Sorry, I had to have Deadpool!
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