Pressing Puzzles

As I hope you've been able to read, I have had a difficult time with being able to function 'normally' in this world as an adult with Asperger's Syndrome. Some of the hardest things I have had to work through are the way I do things. Earlier I have discussed my thinking pattern, my dealing with other people and so on, but here I want to address the simple and complex way I do things like from driving a car to teaching a class; I don't always do it the same way most other people might perform the task. Everyone has an opinion on the best way to do certain tasks and in all fairness, the logic can be very sound, but when you have Asperger's, logic has a way of getting twisted. One of my wife's biggest pet peeves is how I generally drive a car. Technically you would use one foot to drive (unless you drive a stick shift). I however drive with two feet. Can I drive with one foot? Yes, I can easily drive with one foot, but there are times when I'm really pay...

My wife has always been a huge fan of Eeyore the donkey, though I was never sure why. I can with confidence say that not all Asperger people ( Aspies ) suffer from depression, but I can understand the weight one would feel if they were under constant pressure of being autistic. I can find myself slipping into a depressive state if things aren't going the way I had hoped or wishing that my conditions would be better. My condition was Asperger's with OCD, but I've never been diagnosed with depression with the other stuff. My wife is a different story. I know depression can be very dangerous.   As I mentioned a second ago, my wife is a huge Eeyore fan, but she wasn't always depressed. If you go back and read "Tragedy and 2009", I think you might have a better idea why my wife has been depressed. I know she wants to feel better and I know she will, it just takes time, love and therapy to help get through it. I don't believe you can get over it completely, ...

I'm not sure if this is harder for me or my wife. I have learned that some secrets are best kept to one's self because the revelations of the information may actually do more damage than healing. I felt secrets have been saviors and dangers. Having Asperger's, this has to be one of the hardest things to judge because I'm not sure when it's right to hold on to a secret and when to tell. I've always been one to be honest, but holding on to information isn't tough, it's just hard to tell when the time is right to say anything. One of my worst problems has been that I will remember the information I have to keep secret, but then along the way...I forget! The memory problem can create havoc in my head because even though the information might be important, it can still get lost in all the other stuff in my head. There are times when I'll have a secret, but the seriousness of it to me might not be that important, until I mention it later. I have a hard ...

This year marks my 25th high school class reunion. I've only attended one reunion and that was my 10th. Why the 10th? I guess because I was curious to see what had happened to everyone in that first 10 years. Sadly when my wife and I attended, I came to find out that not a lot really changed. They all acted the same way I remember from school, but just 10 years older. I haven't been to a single reunion since. I know there are college reunions, but I've not seen any invitations to any and I'm not sure if I'd ever go. Jaimee had her 25th union last year and she never even gave it a thought. In fact, she hasn't been to any of her reunions. I don't blame her. I guess in some ways technology has bridged the gap for my curiosity into what has happened to old friends...Facebook, Twitter, Google+, etc. In a small way, I wouldn't mind seeing everyone again, but with my Asperger's, it makes it REALLY difficult to suck it up and go. We're having it at a ...

I wanted to pause for a moment to insert a very special moment in my life. On July 26th, 2013 1:34 in the afternoon, my oldest daughter gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Her name is Sophia Kaye Guyles. This is my first grandchild and to me a very special person in my life. I realize many of you that read this blog might already be a grandparent and so with that I must tip my hat to you. I honestly have no idea what is to come, but I am rather excited. There are many times I have to wonder what do I do? How can I be the best grandparent? I think sometimes I do worry about my Asperger's and what kind of effect that might have on my newest member. I will say that I not concerned whether or not Sophia will be autistic because I'll love her just way she is...just like my children. I just know that I want to make sure that she understands that my wife, children and I will always be there for her, but most importantly...Jesus will be there for her. She will hear what the Lo...

Throughout this blog, I've tried to give the average person a glimpse of what it's like to live this life with Asperger's Syndrome. In some ways, if you were to ask me what my brain is like in its thought processes; the best answer I can give you is my mind is like a complicated maze. It is true that I do forget things like information, instructions, what people have said, clothes that were worn, what I did that day, etc. It's mostly my short term memory that slips, but there are many times when I suddenly remember something...pictures, a song, a certain phrase that I hear, something on TV; things like that can all be triggers for my brain to suddenly remember an event or other things that jog my memory. Experts say that people with Asperger's have incredibly high I.Q.'s which I was tested and that is the case. (Actually, Christen and Sarah have been tested with high I.Q.'s as well.) I'm not big on bragging about how smart I am because I didn't do t...

This posting is kind of a sequel to the last posting dealing with Self-Image #47. I mentioned in that post that instead worrying about your appearance, maybe you're better off trying to show others what you can do rather than concerning yourself with appearances. Being able to go out and help others is called the mission field...or basically glorifying God. If you simply do something helpful to someone else and not boasting about it then you're giving God the glory. It doesn't mean you have to go to some foreign country and hand out bibles to be on a mission. In many ways, my classroom is my mission field. I see hundreds of students every day and there are a few times when religion is brought up by the students and I'm able to talk with them about it. I will be honest and tell you that there are times when I wish I could do more than just be in the classroom, but I realize this is where the Lord wants me to be and I'll just have to deal with it. So...You never know...